Die For Me by Amy Plum

Die for Me (Revenants, #1)

Reading the synopsis from the book. What I gather:

Ok, so the dude that Kate falls in love with is obviously something supernatural. I swear, if he’s a freaking fallen angel, I will kill someone. I will burn this book if Vincent is a fallen angel.

Later in the book:

HALLELUJAH! VINCENT IS NOT A FALLEN ANGEL! This story may just be salvaged!

Kate moved to Paris with her sister when her parents died. They live with their grandparents. She has no social life. Her refuge is her books. Then she meets Vincent.

Well, really, she just looks up from her book in a cafe and makes eye contact.

I make eye contact with hundreds of people every week. If I reacted the way she did to each boy that was attractive, I would go mad. Even if I reacted that way to one boy, I would slap myself until I realized how incredibly cheesy I was being. Honestly, the second they make eye contact.

Her: I feel like we’re the only one in the room. This is weird, does he feel it too? Why’s he giving me attention? I’m not pretty! Not nearly as pretty as some of the other girls. *sigh* If only I was my sister. Then I could be beautiful and charming and would go to flirt with him. *sigh* Oh well.

I swear, the insecurity in these paranormal romance books is unbelievable. Oh I’m so ugly! Even though he tells me I’m beautiful all the time! I don’t deserve a hot boy like him! Oh no! 

HE OBVIOUSLY THINKS YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL ENOUGH, SO GET OVER YOURSELF. There’s also this thing called personality, I hear that can attract someone too!

And then they’re all like: (Enter name of very hot boy here), I’m not beautiful! I’m not like the other girls! How can you love me?

Me: >.>

Boy: No, you are beautiful! More beautiful than all the stars combined on a clear night.

Me: <.<

Girl: Aw, I can’t express how much that means to me!

Me: >.>

Boy: You don’t have to, let this speak.

(mushy kiss)

Me: I just..I just had a baby barf right there.

Girl: I love you (enter hot boy name here)!

Me: >.>

Boy: I love you too (enter name of girl here).

Me:….

>.<

No.

That conversation was the epitome of cheesy. I mean, you should be able to search the word cheesy and find that conversation. I swear, all paranormal romance books have a conversation exactly like that. If that ever happens to me in real life, and some boy is being cheesy like that, I would smack him across the face.

And no one was proposed to in this book, but when they do propose in paranormal romance books, it’s something like this:

Boy: We need to talk

Girl: Ok… Omg, is he breaking up with me? I KNEW I was too ugly!

Boy: I just wanted t- what? Are you, are you crying?

Girl: No, I’m just um, I was, you were saying?… HE IS! He’s gonna break up with me!

Boy: Ok, um, well I wanted to tell you that-

Girl: Ok stop! I can’t hear this!

Boy: Why? What?

Girl: If you want to break up with me, just say so!

Boy: What? What? Break up with you? Are you, are you insane?

Girl: See! You don’t love me!! You think I’m insane!

Boy: What? No! No, you’re not insane! I was just-

Girl: No!

Boy: I was just-

Girl: No!

Boy: I was-

Girl: NO!

Boy: LISTEN TO ME! *takes head in hands so they look eye to eye* I AM PROPOSING TO YOU. I LOVE YOU. I WANT TO SPEND THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH YOU!

Girl: *Cries* I know you-wait what? Did you just propose?

Boy: YES!

Girl: Oh! *Proceeds to embrace boy* Yes yes yes yes!

Boy: Finally. We’ll have our own happy ending. We’ll live happily ever after until we die. You’ll be my Juliet. I’ll be your Romeo. We can get through anything.

(That’s the part where I would slap the dude who was proposing to me and tell him to try again)

*Intense kiss*

Now, not all paranormal engagements are like that, but a lot are. Why? Because the main girl is always so freaking insecure! Or she isn’t but she thinks she’s ugly. And guess what? She ends up having like 3 guys fall in love with her and call her beautiful all the time.

So this book was ok, but really really really cheesy. I  used to think I was a hopeless romantic, but then I read this book. If I was a hopeless romantic I would love this book. I don’t love it. I’ll continue with the series, I think.

So out of five faces, Die for Me receives…

*drumroll*

THREE!

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