Something Like Fate by Susane Colasanti

6621143 Lani and Erin are bonded for life. One thing that connects them is their fascination of fate. Lani wonders how much of our lives has already been decided and how much we can actually influence. Since the Unknown can unexpectedly change our lives forever, how much can we really control? From the minute Lani meets Jason, she can’t deny the intense connection they share. It feels like she’s known him forever. She’s not sure if he feels it, too. But it doesn’t matter. Because Jason is Erin’s boyfriend. Lani is determined to ignore her feelings for Jason, no matter how powerful they are, rather than risk hurting her best friend. How long can Lani keep running from the boy who might be her destiny?

I have no idea why I thought this book was a good idea, especially after that synopsis. I mean, seriously, I should have been tipped off by “their fascination of fate.” And then the fact that “the Unknown” is capitalized. That’s just terrible. The Unknown, really? And then that Jason “might be her destiny,” as if the only thing Lani was born for was to find a guy. Not get a job, or make a change in the world, but to get the perfect boyfriend. So there were many instances where I took a picture of the book because I couldn’t believe what I was reading. Okay, I’m turning on sarcasm mode. Let’s begin! I learned so much from this book! It was like a guide to finding my soulmate! So first of all, I have to find a guy that agrees with me on everything. We have to like all the same things, and dislike the same things and do all the same things. *Turning off sarcasm mode for a second because I just cannot explain what “abbreve” is without being honest and making fun of it because it’s just horrendous* So, “abbreve.” Lani apparently has this way of talking where she abbreviates certain words, but there are rules! You can’t just abbreviate any word! That would be ridic!

Lani and Jason are talking at lunch, and apparently Jason just knows the rules of abbreve without her having to explain. And, he just knows what abbreve is without her saying anything. Because of course, abbreve is a thing! (ABBREVE IS NOT A THING) Here is their conversation:

I was complaining about my grade on a history paper, and Jason went, “That’s ridic.”

“Where’d you get that?” I said.

“What?”

“Ridic.”

“Isn’t it common sense?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Oh. Well, I guess I have special abbreve talents then.”

“You know it’s abbreve!”

“Who doesn’t know that?”

“Everyone! I thought I made it up.”

“I thought I made it up.”

You know what I think? I think that was the lamest dialogue I have ever read. And then Lani goes on to say:

I have no idea how he knows these things. Like just now, we both scraped off some icing from our pieces of cake at the same time. Then we tapped our forks together and both went, “Cheers.” I thought I was the only one who did cheers!

Must I even explain what is so horrid about this paragraph? Susane sounds like a middle-aged suburban mom trying to keep up with the “hip” times and connect with the teenagers of today.

Moving on, Lani and Jason are obviously soulmates because they also share a love of kites! (they’re at a kite festival thing) Jason looks at me. “Were you here last year, too?” “I come every year. I love kites.” Wow!

“Really?”

“Kites are awesome. I also love hot-air balloons.” No way!

“Have you ever been in one?”

“No. But you know how they sometimes come down near Smoke Rise?”

“Dude. I’ve been there so many times.”

“Whenever we saw a hot-air balloon when I was little, I got in the car with my mom and we followed it. Then we’d get out to watch when it looked like it was coming down.”

That last part bothers me the most. That was Susane’s attempt to include a familial tradition that Lani can share with Jason so they feel more connected. Too bad it’s the lamest family tradition, especially since there were a bunch of hot-air balloons that came and went every day. You’d go there to ride in one. I seriously doubt Lani’s mom would put up with getting in the car and following a hot-air balloon every single time someone decided to rent one that day. And it’s not even special. I bet a lot of kids would do that (if the hot-air balloons were rare). And then, does the author think we (teenagers) talk about kites? What about kites does Lani think is so “awesome?” I couldn’t care any less about kites. I mean maybe I would, in fifth grade. But I think even then I never cared, especially to make one. And let’s say my city had a kite festival thing every year. I can assure you, maybe one or two high schoolers would go. But it would definitely be elementary, maybe middle schoolers going. Even if kites were “‘cool” with high school students, what wouldn’t be “cool” is hanging out with a bunch of elementary and middle school kids.

So let’s pretend for a second the dialogue was acceptable and skip to the plot. Except to be completely honest, I barely remember the plot of this book…it just didn’t stick with me. I do remember something about an angry email being sent out from Erin, and a whole bunch of drama. Erin was depicted as shallow, which I actually hated because the story would have been so much better and added another layer if both girls were good people. But no, it was very easy for Jason not to like Erin very much, and therefore really easy for him to like Lani even though he was dating Erin. These books seriously piss me off, I mean I don’t know why I do this to myself. Every time, most of the heartbreak could have been avoided if someone manned up and broke up with the other person. Although, if I had a boyfriend (HA) and then he broke up with me to date my best friend, I’d probably never want to see them ever again.So it’s really a lose-lose situation. Well anyway, no boyfriend? No problem.

To be honest I started writing this review about two years ago and I don’t even recall the plot of the book. So I’m not going to add anything and pretend I know what I’m talking about.

I do remember that it sucked, but that’s about it. Oh, and the kite thing. And ABBREVE. Two years later and still…what the hell was up with that?

Anyway I’m going to start up my blog again after a hella long time of not posting, so yay for that! Now I’m off to read Huckleberry Finn for my English class!

 

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